Fab Four

Why oh why is everything in this world designed for a family of four??? Every dinner deal, every vacation trip deal, every nice looking car, everything. Of course I am complaining bitterly because I have a family of five. I just had to overachieve and squeeze two babies out of my second pregnancy, and so now we are one the cursed families that don't fit into anything good in this world. Arrrgggh. I don't know how many times I have wished that my twins were at least identical instead of fraternal - I have these plans where we would book a trip somewhere for four and get the special rate, and then we would dress the twins alike and just keep hiding one somewhere so we could pass for a family of four, like in the bathroom on the plane, or in the bathroom in the hotel lobby when checking in...except that of course my twin girls look nothing alike anymore, other than being about the same size. They won't even wear their hair the same length any more, damn them! So selfish. Ah well. So it occurs to me that for every family of five out there like mine, all pissed off to be missing out on the good deals, there must also be some families of three equally pissed that it costs them as much or more to eat out or travel as it would if they had an extra warm body attached to their family....hmmmm. I may have found a loop hole! I wonder if there is like a match making agency out there somewhere for odd numbered families like ours, some company that would match us up with a family three, so that all we would have to do would be to book our vacations together, for example.  Geez, if there isn't such a service available I should set it up! Hmmmm. Of course for safety's sake you'd have to have one of the adults in my family travel with the family of three, just in case they became a little too fond of one of my kids and didn't want to give her back, and then I suppose that I would be the one who would end up sitting with my three kids on the plane for example, while my husband would "take one for the family" and sit with the strangers, and probably just drink cocktails and sleep the whole time, while I dealt with spilled meals, bickering, and vomit bags...but think of the money we'd save, right, it's about the money.
Maybe I should just lobby for deals for families of five instead.